This post is not about architectural practice or photography, it is about motherhood, something related to many women. I have been trying to write this for months but I did not know how to do it. It is still hard to find the right words. This is based on my experience, I understand not everyone goes through the same, but I need to share it as I know I am not the only one.

A while ago, before having kids, I read a post written by a friend describing how motherhood changed her life and skills. I remember how I enjoyed this text but I did not fully understand it until I became a mom.

I describe myself as someone who enjoys working long hours, and my personality leads me to constantly find new challenges. But what happens when your life has been divided into two different worlds? where worries are more real and you care so much about a little human that you would give up everything to make them happy and obviously to keep them alive. It was until I gave birth to my first baby that I realized how women could face struggles and joy at the same time.

Struggles and Joy

I delivered my first baby in France when the country was new to me. I was desperately looking forward to studying for my second master’s, finding a job and having this baby at the same time. As I was so positive I was going to succeed. I applied to many jobs while pregnant. I was lucky I got job interviews and got contacted via Linkedin a couple of times, everything was perfect until I had to tell them that I was about to have a kid.

It shocked me so much that I fell into a hole of depression. If you have been pregnant you can imagine how the sea of hormones can take you down in a blink of an eye. How could this world be so strange to believe that having a baby is a disadvantage? I could not understand it.

Once I gave birth I decided to do something for myself, I created my job (Fx motions) and unexpectedly I started to gain clients. I always have been selective with the work I take, I was making sure to get the right amount of work so I could cope with the load but I still wanted to practice architecture again as soon as possible. I started my second job search.

I remember preparing my French portfolio with a strong willingness to quit my photography business if needed. Nevertheless, the problem was not my photography activity nor my skills (language included), it was motherhood, many employers do not like moms.

This brought me to try for a freelance position. I was a new mom, I did not know how motherhood works and why employers fear engaging a mom in a full-time position.

Fortunately, after a deep search, things turned out perfect. I found a great architect who was willing to put his trust in my foreign knowledge and allowed me to work with him as a freelancer, I spent great three years working in his practice. I still remember the words he said when I told him that I had a child: ‘congratulations, I have two’.

I am currently working in a new practice and I am lucky to say that I feel supported as well.

Finding work and personal life balance is a hard task, but finding an employer that gives you the support to deal with motherhood and professional life is priceless.

Now it is crystal clear that motherhood is not an obstacle, it is a skill. Motherhood makes you push your limits and makes you do things you never thought you could do. If you are an employer, please, do not be afraid to hire a mom.

I admire all moms, we are amazing.

This job never ends.